To be fair, I'm probably a bit scared of either discipline. I only have one eye, but two working optic nerves. Since ! was 12, when the other eye was removed, on the left I see an egg shaped window into reality . On the right, I see nothingness. A D shaped nothingness roughly behind my right nostril. When I close my eye at night I see black - or sometimes eyelid movies - and still a D shaped nothingness.
Coupled with the fact that I had 20-odd operations prior to 12 trying to save the right eye, involving lengthy separations from my parents and invariably being on an adult ward because most eye conditions that were treatable in those days affected older people and there was no provision for children, I developed extreme mental protections, A particular example of the other place I was in was the nurses allocating me, at the age of approximately 11, to comfort a lad of my age who had been fooling with his father's shotgun and blown his face off, blinding him in both eyes. Coupled with having mild homosexual abuse a couple of times i doubt my mind is understandable by anyone but me, and I would not appreciate anyone trying to poke in to it.
All this and more is true, but against that I have had many years of absolutely wonderful life, and I don't regret a thing - all of it made me. And I am the person who my wife loved.