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GP Denies Giving Woman Cups Of Coffee Containing His Own Semen

Yithian

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Apart from the puerile appeal of the headline, I am not sure what to make of his alleged medical condition.

A Somerset doctor who denies putting his semen into a cup of coffee he made for a woman acquaintance believes it was done as a practical joke by somebody else at his expense, a jury heard yesterday.

Dr Chapman told Gloucester Crown Court he had suffered from a condition since he was 16 that meant he involuntarily 'discharged' from his penis while defecating.

Of how the substance got into the cup of coffee, he added: 'When I tried to put the information together the only scenario that seems to me to make sense is that it was a practical joke played by someone, and it wasn't me, which has gone wrong.'

Dr Chapman, of Taunton, has pleaded not guilty to two charges of trying to engage a woman in sexual activity without her consent between September 12, 2020, and September 12, 2021.

He said: 'It started in the early 1980s when I went to the toilet and it was something my mother noticed.

'I was able to keep this condition a secret from everybody.'

He told the court the reason for having semen in the pots was to test it and that he had been collecting them since 2013 when he was told he had left smear marks on the toilet seat.

He added: 'The purpose of collecting substances in a tube was to avoid smears on the toilet seat and sticking on inside of a bowl.'

He told the jury he would only do this when he was pooing at work which he would do on an 'almost daily basis'.

He acknowledged there were at least ten to 12 'collections' a month and 140 collections a year that he did not put down the toilet.

Chapman also described masturbation - including at work - as 'nothing to do with pleasure - but a painful necessity'.

'I am a very private person, especially when it comes to personal issues such as this,' he told the jury from the witness box.

Significant detail on his semen and collection technique follows:
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/ar...iving-woman-cups-coffee-containing-semen.html
 
I'm just baffled as to how he got from 'involuntarily discharging' to keeping and storing the resultant discharge? I mean, in the vanishingly unlikely event that he did suffer from this 'condition' - what's wrong with wiping it up and flushing the tissue? I agree with the 'weirdo' diagnosis, I'm afraid.
 
I have heard some weird and flimsy excuses, but flippin' eck, how the bejeesus does his brief keep a straight face?!

And even if his medical condition were true, surely you'd just flush it away?

It's a strange world we live in...
 
I have heard some weird and flimsy excuses, but flippin' eck, how the bejeesus does his brief keep a straight face?!

And even if his medical condition were true, surely you'd just flush it away?

It's a strange world we live in...

It is either metaphorically or literally incredible—and I'm leaning towards the latter.
 
Anyone remember those ads in the 80s with Gareth Hunt doing a (a-hem) slightly suggestive 'hand thing' at his female neighbour when offering her a cup of Nescafè Gold Blend?
Yup, I too thought he was requesting a wank. For a cup of instant coffee? No chance.
Or perhaps his character was based on Dr Chapman - 'Guess what's in my hand.'

The Nescafè Gold Blend outtakes are funny. :chuckle:

 
Is ejaculating at the same time as defecating a real thing for some people?
I can confirm it is, yes. Don’t read on if you’re squeamish -

I occasionally have experienced this, it’s only ever a very small amount rather than a full load and it is an odd feeling rather than an enjoyable one. I think it‘s probably caused by the turd pressing agains the wall of the the rectum stimulating the prostate but it has never troubled me enough to get an appointment with my GP. I mean, what would you say to them? It only happens if I’ve had to push hard, so to speak, and I don’t get an erection at the time or beforehand. What I’ve personally never done is fish it out of the toilet bowl and keep it for ’tests’. Or put it in anyone’s coffee.
 
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The bloke's basically obsessed with his own cum. Saving it in jars wasn't a big enough thrill so making women drink it was the logical* next step.

We have a weirdo character at work who messes with others' property, including food and drinks in the fridge.
You're OK if the food is sealed in its packaging but I'd never leave, say, a Tupperware tub of pasta in there.

A female colleague swore she found a Dr Chapman enhancement in an opened bottle of water she'd left to chill overnight.
I said 'Opened?' and she said 'Yeah!' so I said' UNwise!':chuckle:


*No, it doesn't actually make any sense does it. :dunno:

I'm just baffled as to how he got from 'involuntarily discharging' to keeping and storing the resultant discharge? I mean, in the vanishingly unlikely event that he did suffer from this 'condition' - what's wrong with wiping it up and flushing the tissue? I agree with the 'weirdo' diagnosis, I'm afraid.
Yup, you'd think a grown man, and a doctor at that, would learn to deal with his own slightly unusual body-quirk.
Instead he fetishised it.
 
I find it weird that he tried to engage a woman in sexual activity between sept 12 one year to sept 12 the next, it just seems specifically weird
Wipe the toilet seat you weirdo, that guy has issues.
 
A female colleague swore she found a Dr Chapman enhancement in an opened bottle of water she'd left to chill overnight.
Why do I feel the euphemism "Dr. Chapman enhancement" will become a running gag on this forum, further confusing the newbies?

Anyhow, what if he is telling the truth? Someone else at the office might have done it with his saved samples. Is that enough reasonable doubt to acquit?

Of course him saving up the discharges and ejaculate (which were apparently different in nature) is very odd, even if testing semen was considered appropriate for his condition. He's a doctor; surely he could have found a way of disposing them.

As for masturbation being a "painful necessity", a lot of young men suffer from that. It's called being really horny. It usually calms down a bit by the time they reach the doctor's age.
 
Why do I feel the euphemism "Dr. Chapman enhancement" will become a running gag on this forum, further confusing the newbies?

Anyhow, what if he is telling the truth? Someone else at the office might have done it with his saved samples. Is that enough reasonable doubt to acquit?

Of course him saving up the discharges and ejaculate (which were apparently different in nature) is very odd, even if testing semen was considered appropriate for his condition. He's a doctor; surely he could have found a way of disposing them.

As for masturbation being a "painful necessity", a lot of young men suffer from that. It's called being really horny. It usually calms down a bit by the time they reach the doctor's age.
What exactly was he 'testing' the semen FOR? Unless he's worried about his sperm count, this would seem a little...superfluous.
 
I can confirm it is, yes. Don’t read on if you’re squeamish -

I occasionally have experienced this, it’s only ever a very small amount rather than a full load and it is an odd feeling rather than an enjoyable one. I think it‘s probably caused by the turd pressing agains the wall of the the rectum stimulating the prostate but it has never troubled me enough to get an appointment with my GP. I mean, what would you say to them? It only happens if I’ve had to push hard, so to speak, and I don’t get an erection at the time or beforehand. What I’ve personally never done is fish it out of the toilet bowl and keep it for ’tests’. Or put it in anyone’s coffee.
One word - blumpkin.
 
I have heard some weird and flimsy excuses, but flippin' eck, how the bejeesus does his brief keep a straight face?!

And even if his medical condition were true, surely you'd just flush it away?

It's a strange world we live in...
Talking of flimsy excuses - a few years back one of the managers of a builders merchants I used to use told me that they had been losing cash from the till and so had set up a camera to see if they could catch the culprit.

They eventually caught one of the assistant managers dipping in the till on camera and he was sacked. He then took them to court for unfair dismissal claiming that he had recently been struck by a condition which meant he could sometimes go into a kind of sleepwalk state whilst still with his eyes open and wasn't aware of his actions. I think he got away with it too.
 
What exactly was he 'testing' the semen FOR? Unless he's worried about his sperm count, this would seem a little...superfluous.
He said 'The testing of semen may seem unorthodox but NICE guidelines for my condition suggest that testing should be undertaken.'
 
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