How does one summon a succubus?

MrSnowman

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#1
I haven't had much success with ladies in the corporeal world for some time now, so I'm thinking of aiming towards the ethereal.

Or is this a bit risky? :confused:
 
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Anonymous

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#2
Snowman X said:
I haven't had much success with ladies in the corporeal world for some time now, so I'm thinking of aiming towards the ethereal.

Or is this a bit risky? :confused:
Check out the webcam sites. You'll find 'em! :hmph:
 
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Anonymous

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#4
From my reading I would not advise it. These creatures are known to completely drain a man and make him crazed..............or is that the effect you're going for????

As always, I recommend the local branch of your Chicago Rock cafe on Friday evenings, the place is full of them!!!!!
 

Jerry_B

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#5
Monks were warned against sleeping on their stomachs, as it was thought to encourage the activities of succubi. Give that a go :D
 
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Anonymous

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#6
this could be considered salty....you've been warned!

First of all, I would suggest you give up wanking for a while!

Succubi are supposed to be attracted by the pent up sexual energies of men, and are not "summonable" as such.

This does not mean you should avoid sexual thought or desire, on the contrary, you should surround yourself with things of a sexual nature, read sexually charged books and whatnot, make yourself crazy with lust... but don't give in to it!

I know you could just say "Yeah, yeah, yeah, that will just give me wet dreams," but isn't that what succubi are?

I hope you don't think you could summon one to like, hang out with you, or something. They are just there to siphon off a bit of "yer yah!" and be on their merry way!


Trace Mann
 

rynner2

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#8
lizard23 said:
Perhaps this will help...
Blimey! What a palaver!

Perhaps the approach used by a Geordie acquaintance of mine (some years ago) is simpler: he just asked the girls
"Do you f**k on first dates?"

If the answer was 'No' he just moved on to the next one!

He reckoned it saved a lot of time!
 
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Anonymous

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#9
Or you could try the WLTM thread. Fortean ladies galore - you never know, there might be a succubus or two... :p
 

MrSnowman

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#10
rynner said:
Blimey! What a palaver!

Perhaps the approach used by a Geordie acquaintance of mine (some years ago) is simpler: he just asked the girls
"Do you f**k on first dates?"

If the answer was 'No' he just moved on to the next one!

He reckoned it saved a lot of time!
Ah.. a capital tactic, one which, however, is utterly devoid of any gentlemanliness.:(
 
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Anonymous

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#13
As always, I recommend the local branch of your Chicago Rock cafe on Friday evenings, the place is full of them!!!!!
Ahhh so you've been to the Isle of Wight then have you B W ?
:D :eek!!!!:
 
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Anonymous

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#14
Scott Bainbridge said:
Ahhh so you've been to the Isle of Wight then have you B W ?
:D :eek!!!!:
Honey, every Chicago Rock cafe in the country is the same. I fully recommend any gentleman in need of 'company' who's not too fussy to go there.

I used to go there with my friend until after one evening of watching complete strangers grope each other we decided we were too sophisticated to there again (us!!!! Sophisticated!................) :rofl:
 

JamesWhitehead

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#15
I was waiting in the wet all night for a Succubus and would one come?
Nah! Then on the horizon I spotted a swarm of the buggers. Isn't that
always the way! Anyway not one of them was going the way I wanted to
go so I ended up flagging down this Incubus. "I'm all full up, mate" he says.
"That suits me fine", I says and we set off all monastic with me lying on
me belly chewing the back seat.

So that's why I'm late for work, Headmaster. :p
 
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Anonymous

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#16
James Whitehead said:
I was waiting in the wet all night for a Succubus and would one come?
Nah! Then on the horizon I spotted a swarm of the buggers. Isn't that
always the way! Anyway not one of them was going the way I wanted to
go so I ended up flagging down this Incubus. "I'm all full up, mate" he says.
"That suits me fine", I says and we set off all monastic with me lying on
me belly chewing the back seat.

So that's why I'm late for work, Headmaster. :p
See! Far more disturbing than anything on that 'Strange' BBC programme! :p
 
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Anonymous

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#20
Re: this could be considered salty....you've been warned!

ZPumpkinEscobar said:
First of all, I would suggest you give up wanking for a while!
Heaven forfend!

Seems rather drastic.
 

rynner2

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#22
Re: Re: Hmmm...

beakboo said:
You are Barry Cryer and I claim my £5.
I remember this phrase as
"You are Lobby Ludd and I claim my £5."

An internet search turned up this interesting but irrelevent item:
Bassett, Ronald
"Lobby" Ludd's War -- Three otherwise independent novels that all contain the character Signalman "Lobby" Ludd. All have an extensive glossary of lower-deck terminology.

The Tinfish Run, 1977 (Set in 1942, immediately after the ill-fated PQ17 convoy. An ancient British destroyer hunts subs, fights German aircraft in the Arctic. Bassett served in the Arctic aboard a British cruiser. He has made a serious attempt at to have the characters speak in the vernacular of the Royal Navy of the day and to this end includes a thirteen page glossary of (Royal) Navy lower-deck terminology and technical terms. There is also a two page synopsis of the events of the PQ17 convoy.)

The Pierhead Jump 1978, (The American transport SUSQUEHANNA, bound from Oran to the USA with a cargo of Afrika Korps POWs, get sunk by a German U-boat -- which then offers a truce so that survivors can be rescued. Loosely based on the sinking of the LACONIA.)

The Neptune Landing 1979, (LCF49 -- Landing Craft, Flak -- goes to war against Germany in late 1943 through 1944, taking part in the Overlord Invasion, and its aftermath.)
 

Yithian

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#23
Succubus

Blueswidow said:
From my reading I would not advise it. These creatures are known to completely drain a man and make him crazed...
Not wholly unlike their corporeal cousin 'the woman' then!


;)
*heads for the door at pace throwing fearfull glances over his shoulder*
 
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Anonymous

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#24
The New Randall & Hopkirk (Deceased): Re-Evaluation

I just watched the video of the first episode, of the second season of Randall & Hopkirk (deceased).

It stood up better than I expected and featured a succubus like ghost, trapping men to feed the life force of her flammable lover.

She seeks a couple with whom she and her lover can swap spirits.

See attached for point where faceless 'succubus' spirit prepares to possess the body of the deeply sexy Emma Fox!
 

joyzxqk

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#25
Why would you want to???

Yeh, invite a dangerous entity into your bedroom, ill be round in the morning to pick up your remains...

...but heh, it will be a fun last night!

;)


If your really that desperate, visit Amsterdam, bring a whole pile o' cash and have some fun.

Dont let the other side of the species drive you todestraction, its not worth it.
 

Bullseye

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#26
"Oh Succubus from the lower pits of Hell"....."on yours knees bitch":eek!!!!: Works for me!.:cool:
 
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Anonymous

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#27
Why not just conjure up Lilith from the Necronomicon?
Or, put something wicked by your bed side.
When I was heavily into the occult, and had a book on just about every wicked thing known to man, I was visited by an incubus, on and off. Only after I got rid of the books (and drenched my carpet in Holy water) did the bastard never return.
Needless to say, now I have a son who resembles a goat and a daughter with snakes for hair...

(I was kidding about the last part-NOT!No really, I was.)

NOT!


WW
 

Breezilla

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#28
JerryB said:
Monks were warned against sleeping on their stomachs, as it was thought to encourage the activities of succubi. Give that a go :D
That seems like it would be more encouraging to incubi, really... :D
 
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