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People Who Feel Wrong

Swifty said:
No it doesn't. Nepotism is nepotism.
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Have you worked in the Pacific islands?
Also, I'm not talking about "nepotism" I'm talking about remote communities looking after each other - that happens in the UK too. It's not all about Cromer.
 
Swifty said:
Having an extended family staff can be dodgy. I've never been to the Pacific Islands.
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I'm talking about a care home that employs people who are not related to the owners and are related to the residents - I'm not talking about nepotism.
 
Naughty_Felid said:
I'm talking about a care home that employs people who are not related to the owners and are related to the residents - I'm not talking about nepotism.
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I've not experienced the former; staff employed to care for their own relatives within a care home building.
 
PeteS said:
There are indeed, but often their work is subverted by employees who abuse, steal, sleep on duty and generally do all they can to sabotage the business. These characters are in a minority, but the effects of their actions can ruin a home.
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This is true of many organizations at all levels –– a minority of individuals get infected with a lust for power and abuse any power they have. It undermines the ability of others to be constructive.
 
Naughty_Felid said:
I'm talking about a care home that employs people who are not related to the owners and are related to the residents - I'm not talking about nepotism.
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I know what you meant.
Also a lot of the residents will be known to the people who work there - or they will be from neighboring valleys or villages. That means a lot as they are essentially extended family.
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Naughty_Felid said:
At the end of the day no matter where the place is it's down to the owner as to whether the place is any good or not.
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Therein lies a major part of the problem. Corporate owners of care homes (some own several hundred) could not give a toss about care of the elderly, only being interested in financial results.
At the other end of the scale as an example, a care home in the North of the UK was being bought by a couple of early 20 something bankers (not a euphemism) whose sole preoccupation was posing with their rented posh car in front of their rented London flat and posting the results on (anti) social media. They knew nothing about care of the elderly. On the day of the completion of the sale they thought they'd be clever and try and reduce their offer by £500k. Owner told them to get knotted and wouldn't deal with them. Childlike, they threw a spitting dummy wobbler all over FaceTwitGram. It's about time the Care Quality Commission vetted ownership of homes, as they do with registered managers. A lot might improve if they did.
 
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I used to be a cook in a care home and loved it, but we were shut down because myself, but mostly my SiL who worked with me, had had enough of the abuse and nothing being done when we reported it. I have the CQC report, i had left long before they came, so the bit about small meals wasn't me, it was the new cook, i always made sure they had tons, and seconds if they liked, what got me was the fact i didn't know half of the stuff that was going on, being kinda in the kitchen a lot more, and they hired this other manager when they were told that she was screaming in the residents faces, as she previously worked there, she also brought with her her useless bloody family, like chocolate fireguards they were.
This is the report, if you re interested, i was mortified when i read it, some of the stuff they actually did in front of the CQC, Council and Enviromental Health

https://www.cqc.org.uk/sites/default/files/new_reports/INS2-5113550878.pdf

I should point out that they, CQC, were dragging their heels until my SiL said if you don't do something now i am going to the papers, within a few days they descended on the home, i know it must take a while to get all the relevant departments together but come on, these are fragile lives we are talking about here
 
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Shady said:
I used to be a cook in a care home and loved it, but we were shut down because myself, but mostly my SiL who worked with me, had had enough of the abuse and nothing being done when we reported it. I have the CQC report, i had left long before they came, so the bit about small meals wasn't me, it was the new cook, i always made sure they had tons, and seconds if they liked, what got me was the fact i didn't know half of the stuff that was going on, being kinda in the kitchen a lot more, and they hired this other manager when they were told that she was screaming in the residents faces, as she previously worked there, she also brought with her her useless bloody family, like chocolate fireguards they were.
This is the report, if you re interested, i was mortified when i read it, some of the stuff they actually did in front of the CQC, Council and Enviromental Health

https://www.cqc.org.uk/sites/default/files/new_reports/INS2-5113550878.pdf

I should point out that they, CQC, were dragging their heels until my SiL said if you don't do something now i am going to the papers, within a few days they descended on the home, i know it must take a while to get all the relevant departments together but come on, these are fragile lives we are talking about here
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About as bad as it gets there Shady, and sadly all too common. During the pandemic, CQC have not apparently been undertaking any inspections, so much more of the stuff mentioned in the report above, will have been going on. Terrible.
 
Damn that is so true Pete, worries you to think it could be happening
Luckily they shut it down, they called in all the staff and the residents families and told them they have three days to find somewhere for them all. I wasn't working there at the time i had left months ago, just after we reported them, but i knew a lot of the girls there so got info, apparently they all descended on them at once and started their audit., so it must have been just after the audit they shut it down. It has now been sold on and it is no longer a home for the elderly. I would like to say that there were some really really great carers there, ones i would trust to look after my family, but the others just let them down
 
I'm so grateful that my mum is cared for well in the home she is in in Morecambe. I can cycle there in about 15 minutes.

We checked the CQC reports and they were fine. She is on the ground floor as she is relatively independent. There are four floors and the higher up you go the greater their personal needs are.

I am a little concerned as to when she gets more dependent as I don't know what goes on only the ground floor. I haven't taken her out or hugged her since March. But at least I can bellow at her through the window after her Sunday dinner. She always bellows back "have to brought mi fags?".
 
Spudrick68 said:
I'm so grateful that my mum is cared for well in the home she is in in Morecambe. I can cycle there in about 15 minutes.

We checked the CQC reports and they were fine. She is on the ground floor as she is relatively independent. There are four floors and the higher up you go the greater their personal needs are.

I am a little concerned as to when she gets more dependent as I don't know what goes on only the ground floor. I haven't taken her out or hugged her since March. But at least I can bellow at her through the window after her Sunday dinner. She always bellows back "have to brought mi fags?".
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Residents who are even relatively independent are much less vulnerable Spud. After my mother fell a couple of times (doing stuff she had been specifically asked not to do by me and the staff) she became wheelchair bound and her wellbeing deteriorated profoundly. Sad to see.
 
PeteS said:
Residents who are even relatively independent are much less vulnerable Spud. After my mother fell a couple of times (doing stuff she had been specifically asked not to do by me and the staff) she became wheelchair bound and her wellbeing deteriorated profoundly. Sad to see.
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That kind of story haunts me because if the next 20 years goes by as fast as the last 20 years... My hope is that I go to bed one night and just never wake up again. *fingers crossed*
 
michael59 said:
That kind of story haunts me because if the next 20 years goes by as fast as the last 20 years... My hope is that I go to bed one night and just never wake up again. *fingers crossed*
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I guess that's the way to go, but a hell of a trauma for loved ones. Also - what is it about 20 years? My thoughts exactly.
 
You lot! Since I was 50 I've been thinking '20 years left if I'm lucky!' and now BOOM, I'm 62.

I'm fit though. t'other day at the DIY I took my decorating stuff to the till and noticed I'd collected the wrong paint. It was one of those big 'uge tubs where you get 2 for £10.

So I took it back to the display, carrying it in both hands, crouching down to step under the queue barrier both ways without putting the tubs down or stopping. I bet a lot of people my age can't do that.
 
escargot said:
'm fit though. t'other day at the DIY I took my decorating stuff to the till and noticed I'd collected the wrong paint. It was one of those big 'uge tubs where you get 2 for £10.

So I took it back to the display, carrying it in both hands, crouching down to step under the queue barrier both ways without putting the tubs down or stopping. I bet a lot of people my age can't do that.
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It weren't no cargo for Escargot...
 
Quick update. We recently heard the "people who feel wrong" I've been on about here, have both now been charged with animal cruelty. Because of backlogs at local courts, they won't be up til the summer. But glad the folk concerned were able to get it past the CPS and that it's going ahead as I hear some similar cases have been dropped due to the backlog.

Saw them going out dressed to the nines for their hearing, the other week, that set a court date. Although they scrub up convincingly for a pair of drunks, and sobered up for a week or so before the hearing - I hope the court can feel the same awful, creepy atmosphere that seems to follow them around. This morning I was upstairs and they had gone out (silently) to get into their car, and even before I heard a thing, I knew they were there. Looked down and there they were. That feeling described as the hairs going up on the back of your neck - that feeling you get when you know you're being watched - it's something really visceral and primeval, but I know when they're outside, before I even look out to see if they are. I just hope that on the day, others pick up the feeling I get from them.
 
escargot said:
You lot! Since I was 50 I've been thinking '20 years left if I'm lucky!' and now BOOM, I'm 62.

I'm fit though. t'other day at the DIY I took my decorating stuff to the till and noticed I'd collected the wrong paint. It was one of those big 'uge tubs where you get 2 for £10.

So I took it back to the display, carrying it in both hands, crouching down to step under the queue barrier both ways without putting the tubs down or stopping. I bet a lot of people my age can't do that.
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Well they do moisturiser with snail slime (or something) in now, so you snails are all remarkably youthful to look at...
 
escargot said:
The song IS about Alice In Wonderland. It uses the story as an extended metaphor about drug use.
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Reading through the lyrics it does seem to be more about mind control than drugs. Mind control conspiracies were all the rage at that time and Alice in Wonderland does tend to get used a lot in that context.
 
Stella Gardiner said:
Reading through the lyrics it does seem to be more about mind control than drugs. Mind control conspiracies were all the rage at that time and Alice in Wonderland does tend to get used a lot in that context.
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The writer and the band confirmed it was all about taking drugs, and were apparently astonished it got past the official censor. I suspect that in those much simpler times the censor had no idea what the song was all about.
 
I've been thinking about people I've personally known who felt a bit odd or off, but actually what I want to share is a family I observed in a Chinese buffet a few years ago. I'm not one for watching/observing random people intently but honestly, I just couldn't take my eyes off them. Reason being that they looked like characters straight out of Roald Dahl books. The parents and other adult members of the group reminded me of Matilda's family, and yet the child really reminded me of Veruca Salt. I can't remember her specific behaviour but I remember thinking that she came across as exceptionally stroppy/spoilt even by kids standards. They seemed pretty overdressed for a chinese buffet (let alone one situated in a shopping centre) but their outfits and overall presentation also seemed fairly odd, as they seemed out of fashion but I couldn't actually decide a time/place where they would have fit in, if that makes sense?? Overall they came across as a parody of Roald Dahl characters, and I suppose in a way that felt a bit off.

It's funny how certain things stick with you!
 
I met a person once who, if they were in a movie, they would be the one possessed by the ghost of a killer. If you asked them to do something they would slowly consider it. You could tell the decision cogs were whirring away - comply or kill. Once the decision was made then “ok” and they would just get on with it. If the decision had gone the other way they would probably have been just as happy to plunge a knife in you and then play tea parties with the dead bodies.
 
gordonrutter said:
I met a person once who, if they were in a movie, they would be the one possessed by the ghost of a killer. If you asked them to do something they would slowly consider it. You could tell the decision cogs were whirring away - comply or kill. Once the decision was made then “ok” and they would just get on with it. If the decision had gone the other way they would probably have been just as happy to plunge a knife in you and then play tea parties with the dead bodies.
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May have been somebody with a lasting brain injury. I was at college with a guy like that. He zoned out a lot and couldn't follow a line of argument. The college let him keep coming back, but he kept failing his exams. He'd had a motorbike accident when he was a teenager and the surgeons had had to extract bits of the helmet from his busted head. When talking to him, you could almost see the cogs whirring, so to speak.
 
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