No, but I would have sworn that someone wasn't all there.
In your shoes Ms Escargot I would have been tempted to secretly record Mrs T'n'T and used a transcription of the verbiage to write a play. With a little tweaking it could be brilliant. And hilarious.
I dunno. Maybe it's just me, but the story of the girl who could 'make things happen' and who seemed old beyond her years just made me think that she had been sexually abused from a very early age. I;ve seen it before in (usually) girls who have been forced into precocious sexual situations - an almost unnatural confidence. As though the worst has already happened, so everything else must be better...
Yup, when I worked in kids' homes we could spot girls who'd been forced into precocious sexual situations first by an air of confidence, which we knew to be actually bravado, and secondly by how they treated female and male staff differently.
Excellent, thanks for mentioning that, I just learnt a new thing. Makes sense of my personal notion that markets perform some sociological function that's nearly baked into our DNA. It's a weak tie thing.Yup, in sociological terms you are performing a very important societal function there; sustaining weak ties.
Chatting amicably with strangers or people we don't know well is reassuring and educational.
If we spoke and interacted solely with people we know, we'd be socially isolated and possibly under coercive control of some sort.
This is achieved by cults and extreme religious communities through the permitting of only strong ties.
Humans need a mixture of strong and weak ties to function well in society.
Weak Tie Theory - justifying gossiping with randoms since 1973.
Weak/strong ties are like a revelation.
That's all very well for you to say- but not when I get the loony in the queue in the supermarket.
I did mention that the helpful form of chat with strangers is amicable.
Sounds like I may have served you recently...
This was something that I really missed during lockdown. The staff in "non essential" shops. Folk on the bus. All that stuff.
How very dare you! No spittle was involved.
Oh no.
Don't worry- there will be next time young lady.....
Yeah, I think that stuff seems inconsequential, but really it isn't.
Oi!
Weak ties. Friendly greetings, good manners, tiny helpful actions, being pleasant to serve. Fitting in on a superficial level. Showing highly developed social skills. Giving an air of trustworthiness.
You're a walking dead man old mate. Can I have your Bee Gees albums?
So to some autistics 'weak-tie' interchanges appear to have no point, reason or necessity?
Just like non-autistics, then?
I didn't come up with the term. It was coined by Mark S. Granovetter, explained in his 1973 American Journal of Sociology paper:
My (adult) kid with autism works in retail and he's a total showman! Went in his shop recently and he was centre of attention, demonstrating something (they make a product whilst the customers watch, sometimes) - absolutely fearless and funny as feck - can find him on Instagram doing the same and it's usually him that they're filming... And of course, I realised - he's spent his entire life masking - of course he'd be good at retail. He has a great way with customers. I'd just want to tw*t them after half an hour or so.
I was out and about today and started thinking about your initial remark on weak ties Escargot. Made me realize that these short, friendly exchanges enable us to feel safe in the world among people we don't know. Without these demonstrations of friendly intentions and behavior, we wouldn't know if we could trust the strangers around us or not. When people are isolated, they receive no evidence that those unknown people are not a threat.
Same here. It's tiring just having a short convo with my Mum (nothing BUT small talk).
I did and it said I was not. But it could be wrong.
