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Worst Movie EVER?

Heckler20 said:
If you mean the Guy Ritchie one, I really enjoyed it. I'm a huge fan of Holmes on the page and watch one of the Brett Holmes stories every weekend and whilst this Holmes is very much certain aspects of his character exaggerated to the max it's still enormous fun. Certainly the character of Watson in the movie is closest to the feel of the character in the books.

All that said, the less said about the sequel the better....[/QUO
Yes thats the one, we are both fans of Sherlock but this one was a farce, like you say a comedy
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BaronHardacre said:
I bought the sequel from an Asda bargain bin for £3. I felt ripped off at that...
However, worst film ever...? Not for me...

My list would have to include Braveheart (overlong, racist and homophobic), Crash (the Cronenberg one. Car crash indeed...), Rollerball (the remake; weird night-vision scenes, and Jean Reno channelling the look of Bruce Grobbelaar), Titanic (lets take one of the greatest maratime disasters and tack on a cliched and sacharrine love story), and Avatar (Pocahontas with giant Smufs and patronising eco theme).
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that's a very good list.
 
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Naughty_Felid said:
that's a very good list.
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With the exception of Avatar; I think it portrays perfectly what should happen to the first humans to reach, colonise and rape an inhabited planet (whether at the hands of big blue smurfs or little green rodents). Can't wait for the sequel.
 
Does the Gamera collection I just bought count as "Worst Movies Ever"? Why, yes, of course they do!
 
Children of the Living Dead ... I adore crappy zero budget zombie films and even I hated it.

Gay Niggers From Outer Space ... we all watched it one Christmas day a few years back assuming it would be a comedy because of its blatantly shocking title ... it wasn't funny at all even though we were drinking absinth at the time.
 
Swifty said:
Children of the Living Dead ... I adore crappy zero budget zombie films and even I hated it.

Gay Niggers From Outer Space ... we all watched it one Christmas day a few years back assuming it would be a comedy because of its blatantly shocking title ... it wasn't funny at all even though we were drinking absinth at the time.
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You never viewed the title of the latter one as a sign of this might be a bad movie?
 
Yeah, I don't think I could watch something with such an offensive title.
 
PeteByrdie said:
I would have to watch it out of curiosity.
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But consider all the unpleasant pictures you will have in your head, these pictures will haunt you at nights.

The Amazon Women on the Moon sounds like an interesting por.....I mean movie
 
Ice said:
But consider all the unpleasant pictures you will have in your head, these pictures will haunt you at nights.

The Amazon Women on the Moon sounds like an interesting por.....I mean movie
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I've got plenty of unpleasant pictures already in my head. Many of them from porn. (Those search terms you type in often don't prepare you for what you're about to see.:( )
 
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"Brother From Another Planet" - so bad, I stopped watching after twenty minutes...

By bad, I mean I mean boring...
 
Peripart said:
That's quite some effort for very little reward. You must have spent half the day at the cinema!
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I just like the feeling of sitting in the cinema. I'll go and see just about anything. Even Zoolander 2 is better than sitting at home watching game shows.
 
I watched The Zero Theorem the other day. Not the worst film ever, but surely the worst from Gilliam.

The interviews he's given about the film are far more interesting and focused than the film itself.

Perhaps it would have worked much better as a short. As a full length film, it just felt very repetitive and rambling. Great design, though.
 
graylien said:
I watched The Zero Theorem the other day. Not the worst film ever, but surely the worst from Gilliam.

The interviews he's given about the film are far more interesting and focused than the film itself.

Perhaps it would have worked much better as a short. As a full length film, it just felt very repetitive and rambling. Great design, though.
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Yeah, sad to say I think we've already seen the best of what Gilliam can deliver.
Seems such a shame that some of his best years were squandered in fights with the money men.
Don't get me wrong, he's got a rich, and wondourous back catalogue, but if studios would have just had faith, we could have so much more...
 
PeteByrdie said:
I've got plenty of unpleasant pictures already in my head. Many of them from porn. (Those search terms you type in often don't prepare you for what you're about to see.:( )
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I can relate to that, I googled a pub in Liverpool, the pub has the name Cock and the seaman, I did a slightly spelling error of word seaman and I did an image search......That was a huge shock.....
 
Ice said:
You never viewed the title of the latter one as a sign of this might be a bad movie?
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The offensive title was the only reason we decided to watch it. And we had a bottle of Absinth .. there's clips from it on Youtube.

 
Ice said:
I can relate to that, I googled a pub in Liverpool, the pub has the name Cock and the seaman, I did a slightly spelling error of word seaman and I did an image search......That was a huge shock.....
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OK, I'll believe you. ;)
 
davidplankton said:
Did you do that thing where you soak a spoonful of sugar in the Absinth, light it then stir it into your drink? I engulfed the kitchen table in blue flames doing that.(Being pissed before even starting on the Absinth)
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LOL ... Yep we did and so were we but no tables were harmed at Mark's place.
 
davidplankton said:
I went to bed with strange green swirling geometrical patterns in front of my eyes. The first time I've ever 'seen' anything whilst drunk.
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I'd take that any day instead of re watching Gay African American Gentlemen From Outer Space whilst drunk.
 
Swifty said:
The offensive title was the only reason we decided to watch it. And we had a bottle of Absinth .. there's clips from it on Youtube.

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I think I pass on watching that one. If you upload the Amazon women movie here is an entire different matter. I goona do an image search on the term amazon women, brb
 
Ice said:
I think I pass on watching that one. If you upload the Amazon women movie here is an entire different matter. I goona do an image search on the term amazon women, brb
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I liked Amazon Women on the Moon .. I've still got it on VHS tape :) .. see you in a bit.

*puts the kettle on for Ice*
 
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Swifty said:
I liked Amazon Women on the Moon .. I've still got it on VHS tape :) .. see you in a bit.

*puts the kettle on for Ice*
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That was interesting, I must investigate this further (when I've bought more tissues)
 
Ice said:
Yep, a box of tissues is handy to have when you watch amazon women
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There's only one naked woman in it (80s pinup Monique Gabrielle). It's a sketch film like The Kentucky Fried Movie, only not as funny. Has its moments, though, I like Don "No Soul" Simmons.
 
Swifty said:
Children of the Living Dead (2001) ... I adore crappy zero budget zombie films and even I hated it. The only slightly good thing about it was that they somehow talked Tom Savini into performing a small role. I think there was only one zombie in it and he spent all the time standing in a barn looking like his favourite boy band had just split up or something. Zero suspense and badly made. Even the director bad mouthed it ..

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I mentioned this film here probably quite a few pages back.

Wiki says:

Serial murderer and rapist Abbot Hayes disappears from the morgue and becomes the leader of several waves of zombies that attack his home town. Fourteen years after the last zombie attack, a businessman relocates bodies from a local cemetery to pave the way for progress, but sets in motion Abbot's next undead assault.
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I remember it starting off as zombie killer Savini getting killed off very early by the least scary zombie ever, Abbot Hayes. The scariest thing about this film? It was made in 2001!!

Since I haven't seen it in a while and I doubt I will watch it again, here's a review below from IMDB:

This film is the most hideous thing you can imagine. To give you an example of how bad this is, one of the reasons given why the dead are coming back to life is that the zombie king (?) was forced to cross dress as a child.
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