Childhood Memory

[Feech23]

Another thread I just read about the child seeing the old lady in black with the limp triggered a memory of a sad time for my family in the early 1980s when my aunt died suddenly in London and her husband died at the funeral. Our cousins were staying with us in Ireland as the adults travelled over to London for the funeral. I was sleeping in my parent's room with my sister, I would have been maybe 11, my sister 8. I distinctly recall two people standing over the bed just looking down at us smiling whom I took to this day to be my late aunt and uncle. I must ask my uber serious businesswoman sister does she remember this incident as my recall is that both of us seen them. Gosh thinking of them now is so sad lord rest them all.

 

[Mr_Hermolle]

I've read lots of reports of people who are dying seeing relatives who have passed away, but this is the firth time I've heard of someone else seeing them. Interesting. Do you remember what they were doing or were they just standing?

 

[merricat]

That sounds like a very sad set of events, I'm sorry to hear.
It is always worth asking your sister, although I do find that individuals often possess different memories of the same event, depending upon their beliefs and culture at the time, and also at the time of recollection. Many prefer to stuff unpleasant or mysterious happenings away for good, and will dismiss them readily, regardless what they may have originally witnessed. Did you not discuss it with her at the time or the day after?
It is nice to think it may have been your uncle and aunt, and the close proximity of their passing certainly makes sense, but this might also mean you were thinking of them potently enough to provoke a dream. Unless you both acknowledged witnessing at the time, you may never find out exactly what occurred. Good luck with your sister, I am going to presume you will be able to tell via her reaction if it rings a bell, even if she dismisses it.

Mr_Hermolle: I've heard of quite a few cases like this. My (no nonsense) late dad saw several distant relatives out and about, one or two even waving at him and acknowledging him, only later to discover they had recently died, maybe up to a week before the sighting. Thankfully, I didn't inherit this trait!

​

 

[Mr_Hermolle]

That sounds like a very sad set of events, I'm sorry to hear.
It is always worth asking your sister, although I do find that individuals often possess different memories of the same event, depending upon their beliefs and culture at the time, and also at the time of recollection. Many prefer to stuff unpleasant or mysterious happenings away for good, and will dismiss them readily, regardless what they may have originally witnessed. Did you not discuss it with her at the time or the day after?
It is nice to think it may have been your uncle and aunt, and the close proximity of their passing certainly makes sense, but this might also mean you were thinking of them potently enough to provoke a dream. Unless you both acknowledged witnessing at the time, you may never find out exactly what occurred. Good luck with your sister, I am going to presume you will be able to tell via her reaction if it rings a bell, even if she dismisses it.

Mr_Hermolle: I've heard of quite a few cases like this. My (no nonsense) late dad saw several distant relatives out and about, one or two even waving at him and acknowledging him, only later to discover they had recently died, maybe up to a week before the sighting. Thankfully, I didn't inherit this trait!

​

Its interesting isnt it how so many people you wouldnt expect to experience something do. I find it quitr comforting - deeper levels of reality. Makes a nice couterpoint to my unfortunate tendency to try end explain everything away.

 

[Mr_Hermolle]

Away from the original topic perhaps but I have an odd childhood memory, going back 40 years to when I was 10. At the back of our house we were living in was a farmers field on a slightly lower level to the garden. At the edge of the field was what seemed to be a marshy ares full of long grass. I remember being fascinated by the sound of running water - a stream I couldnt see? One day the fence was down and I got to explore this marshy area. Thete was indeed a small stream flowing from a culvert that came from under the garden. In my memory the stream was narrow but quite deep , leading off from this there was a deep trench full of weird orange mud. We played there for a couple of weeks until the farmers son (our age) came over and said we would be in 'serious trouble' if we were caught playing there... So we didnt and the fences soon got fixed anyway. The whole memory seems unreal and dream-like. No-on else in my family remembers this area anf the stream. Met up over the weekend with my next door neighbor for the first time since the 80s. He bought up the stream as well - I spoke to his parents whp have no memory of the stream either. Seems its just me and him. But its odf how such a small thing has becone such a vivid memory - more important than what the memory should be. My old 10xt door neighbour felt the same too - he was only 5 years old at the time as well - I was 10. Ive looked on Google Maps too and theres just a farmers field - no sign of a stream or a grassy area. Maybe it got filled in - but the whole memory has a heavy strangeness about it.

 

[Tempest63]

I have a very very vague childhood memory from when I was 5 years old and was involved in an accident where I received a nasty cut below an eye. Other than that most of my earliest memories are from when I was 7, 8 or older.
I do find it a little unbelievable when listening to psychics and mediums who claim to have extremely clear recollections of interactions with spirits from the age of 3. And a guy on telly recently was recounting the sad death of his mother from a heart attack when he was 3 years old and was saying how helpless he remembers feeling because he couldn’t help with the CPR that others were attempting to save his mothers life. I strongly suspect he would have little understanding of what was happening at that age.
Am I unusual in not being able to clearly remember incidents from age 3 or are some of these people imagining false memories from such a tender age?

 

[Mr_Hermolle]

Lots of mixed up memories I imagine. I read that people start forming memories around the age of 3. Very early memories are probably a mix of real memories, fragments, stuff people have told them, all mixed up together. My own memories do seem a lot more cohesive from the age of 8 onwards - before then they are there but seem snippets, rather than something connected to a 'life-narrative'.

 

[EnolaGaia]

... I read that people start forming memories around the age of 3. ...

It doesn't seem to be until around age 3 that (as you put it ... ) memories of specific incidents (one-time or recurrent) get integrated into an ongoing personal narrative. However, individual memories can be formed much earlier and retained. Back in 2009 I posted the story of memories from my infancy, including one specific incident that could not have occurred later than when I was circa 1.5 years old:

https://forums.forteana.org/index.php?threads/earliest-memories.5908/post-890866

 

[Iris]

Maybe it's just snippets that we remember from a very early age.
The first memory I have is my Mother going to breast feed me and complaining I had bitten her the last time so I must have been very young.
After that it was where I was told my Father was coming home when I was 15 months.

 

[PeteS]

It doesn't seem to be until around age 3 that (as you put it ... ) memories of specific incidents (one-time or recurrent) get integrated into an ongoing personal narrative. However, individual memories can be formed much earlier and retained. Back in 2009 I posted the story of memories from my infancy, including one specific incident that could not have occurred later than when I was circa 1.5 years old:

https://forums.forteana.org/index.php?threads/earliest-memories.5908/post-890866

Similarly I have memories of lying in my cot, which must have been at the same age, being very ill and my father sitting next to the cot watching me through the bars. Apparently I had measles. I could not have been much older when I have a memory of being carried in a hospital when I had an injured arm (never found out what had happened). Probably traumatic incidents get more ingrained than normal events in infancy.

 

[queenofwands]

Similarly I have memories of lying in my cot, which must have been at the same age, being very ill and my father sitting next to the cot watching me through the bars. Apparently I had measles. I could not have been much older when I have a memory of being carried in a hospital when I had an injured arm (never found out what had happened). Probably traumatic incidents get more ingrained than normal events in infancy.

I have very clear and vivid memories from being three years old and some of even earlier.

 

[SimonBurchell]

I have a couple of memories from 3 or 4 years old, and one which I have always associated with being born (posted here if you're really that interested).

I remember my mum taking me to meet my older brother who was coming home from school, with his satchel, across a park in Camberley, a town we moved out of when I was about 3 years old.

I have a memory of being given some brightly coloured little biscuits by my next door neighbour and eating one, and my mum and my neighbour laughing and telling me they were dog biscuits - I think I was 4 years old at the time.

 

[Sid]

My earliest 'memory' (an unverifiable one though - "understandably so") was feeling so very cold and shivering, it was the feeling of being born - i.e., vague - but conscious memory of coming into the world (I was informed later on that it was at 1 O'clock in the morning) on one of the coldest days during one of the coldest winters in Scotland. After which remembering (sense-wise) the smells of the materials that were used in the linings of the pram. Then my next memory would be Mum & Dad, me and my older Sister in pigtails, and a Collie dog sitting on a stone dyke that ran alongside a park posing for a photograph - the only time I ever had to wear a tartan kilt!

 

[Bad Bungle]

I have a missing childhood memory. I've seen several photos of me at Coventry Cathedral reading the plaque at the centre of the previous bombed-out site. I'm aged about 8-9 and with my parents and siblings (all wearing matching jumpers) BUT absolutely no recollection of why we were there (no friends in the area), how we got there (130 mile round trip) and I would swear I'd never having been anywhere near Coventry if not for the evidence to the contrary.

 

[Sollywos]

I have no way of verifying when this happened but I'm pretty sure it was the night my sister was born. I was in my cot on my back and was playing with my tin musical box. Ah they knew how to make decent toys in them there days none of yer plastic rubbish. Anyone else on here old enough to have had one? Basically a closed tin with a wooden handle that had a nursery rhyme pictured on the outside. when the handle was turned it played a plinky plonk version of the rhyme. Now I must have done this loads of times but this particular time Dads face loomed over the side and then he lifted me out so it became engrained.

The next snapshot of memory in my life narrative was being in a cot in my parternal grandparents house and watching the curtains blowing in the summer breeze. I only stayed at their house the once for about a week and that was when my sister was born. Mum would have gone to her mothers house at the other end of the village, dad's mum lived about four miles away and dad would have had to take me there in my pram dragging it behind his bike which I'm assuming is why he'd come to pick me out of the cot. but as I said I've no way of confirming that but it's a memory I've aways had and it seems likely.

The next memory is being put outside on the back lawn for my afternoon nap in the push chair and feeling a bit put out as it was usually the pram! There was noise at the back door and I looked across to see mum easing the pram down the step so I assumed she was going to put me in it afterall, 'Oh goody!' but no chance! She said as I was awake I'd got to go on the front lawn in case I woke up the baby. 'Who is it?' I wanted to know so she lifted me up to show me and said we've already told you, she's your new sister and you are the big girl now. I was still bemused by the whole thing and not best pleased

I was a year and nine months old when my sister was born.

 

[maximus otter]

…most of my earliest memories are from when I was 7, 8 or older.

Am I unusual in not being able to clearly remember incidents from age 3 or are some of these people imagining false memories from such a tender age?

Ditto here.

l lived in Norway from age 5/6 to 7/8, and l have a few memories of specific occurrences there, but things only start to firm up and become coherent later.

maximus otter

 

[Kate In The Desert]

I have a very very vague childhood memory from when I was 5 years old and was involved in an accident where I received a nasty cut below an eye. Other than that most of my earliest memories are from when I was 7, 8 or older.
I do find it a little unbelievable when listening to psychics and mediums who claim to have extremely clear recollections of interactions with spirits from the age of 3. And a guy on telly recently was recounting the sad death of his mother from a heart attack when he was 3 years old and was saying how helpless he remembers feeling because he couldn’t help with the CPR that others were attempting to save his mothers life. I strongly suspect he would have little understanding of what was happening at that age.

Am I unusual in not being able to clearly remember incidents from age 3 or are some of these people imagining false memories from such a tender age?

Not at all! You are the normal one. Although I have many clear memories from age 3, and a few before that, people tend to disbelieve, saying I heard stories from family members and created a "false memory."

I disagree, of course. I have memories of things that happened when I was all alone, which I never told other people, They can hardly tell me a story about an event in my life if they never knew about it.

One particular instance stands out. I was in the back yard playing, then went over to the concrete base of one of the poles used to hold up the clothes line. My parents had poured the small circle of concrete, but they buried various colorful marbles halfway into the concrete in the form of a circle. They struck me as being magical.

But then, an ant trespassed by walking across the concrete base. I applied my 3-year-old's sense of justice. Without a second thought I popped the ant in my mouth and ate it. I can tell you today that it tasted very bitter. I never told anyone in my family because I sensed potential disapproval.

 

[Iris]

I think that i wrote once before somewhere about very early memories of when my father came home from the war.
Another I recall is when I was about 3 and my Father was chopping wood. There was an old fashioned clothes line with rope hanging down at the ends and I had stood on a piece of wood and was swinging to and fro, resting on a loop of rope which I could just reach.
Then the wood slipped and the rope went around my neck .
I tried to call out but there was no sound.
Then my Mother came to the door, saw me and called out to my Father, who took me down.

 

[Sogna]

I have very clear memories from the age of two, including my sister being born, and some vague ones from earlier than that. I certainly remember England winning the World Cup in 1966 and being taught to read before I started school, both when I was three.

 

[Sid]

I think that i wrote once before somewhere about very early memories of when my father came home from the war.
Another I recall is when I was about 3 and my Father was chopping wood. There was an old fashioned clothes line with rope hanging down at the ends and I had stood on a piece of wood and was swinging to and fro, resting on a loop of rope which I could just reach.
Then the wood slipped and the rope went around my neck .
I tried to call out but there was no sound.
Then my Mother came to the door, saw me and called out to my Father, who took me down.

Sounds like you might have had a very close call there 'Iris!'

 

[Iris]

Sid I guess that it wasn't my time yet. I remember feeling quite calm, not in any pain, I was just there.

 

[Spudrick68]

My earliest memory was my mum plonking me at the back door. Snow was on the ground and i had never seen snow before..

I must have been a toddler as I toddled out, fell on my arse and burst into tears.

My mum was amazed that I recalled it, but I couldn't tell you how old I was.

 

[GerdaWordyer]

I have only one or two memories before the age of six, then after that I have lots of clear memories. I've always wondered if the skill of learning to read clarified and reinforced my perceptions. Perhaps leaving the nest and the socialization of attending school helped, though I attended kindergarten at age five. Does anyone else think that reading made any change?

 

[Sid]

I have only one or two memories before the age of six, then after that I have lots of clear memories. I've always wondered if the skill of learning to read clarified and reinforced my perceptions. Perhaps leaving the nest and the socialization of attending school helped, though I attended kindergarten at age five. Does anyone else think that reading made any change?

I think it might have more to do with the senses from some kind of significant 'input' that lays down a memory marker.

 

[EnolaGaia]

I have only one or two memories before the age of six, then after that I have lots of clear memories. I've always wondered if the skill of learning to read clarified and reinforced my perceptions. Perhaps leaving the nest and the socialization of attending school helped, though I attended kindergarten at age five. Does anyone else think that reading made any change?

I think reading skills could indeed affect the ability to retain memories, through developing and honing the use of imagination (e.g., visualization of something not immediately present). Following an extended path of text requires some imaginative engagement (to visualize what's described) and some degree of memory to trace how new content adds to (etc.) what's already been absorbed.

On the other hand, I loved browsing through and studying what I could understand of books and magazines long before I could actually read, and I liked more "adult" TV / radio programs (like news and discussion), whether or not I really grasped what they were talking about.

 

[bugmum]

I have a memory of running up a slope towards a lighthouse behind my sister and my cousins. I guessed that this must have been during a visit to Plymouth in the early 70s, when I was maybe 2 or 3 years old.

About 16 years later, whilst at University in Plymouth, I was walking around the Hoe and came up towards Smeaton's Tower from a different angle, when I realised that this was the POV from my memory.

A year or so ago I was looking through some slides of my dad's which we keep meaning to scan and came across some pictures from that stay with my family; I still had red hair, which meant I was VERY young.

 

[zappagirl]

I have a number of very early memories - these two of which must have occurred prior to the age of three (as my brother was born when I was three and a half, and he was not present in either of these scenarios (definitely the first)).

The first is of being alone in the ‘front room’ – which was a large living room with (it was the 1970s) heavy brown velvet curtains. There’s no question that the curtains existed as I later reappropriated them for my bedroom due to their excellent blackout qualities!

Anyway, I was alone in the living room, and I remember that the curtains were closed (or I may have closed them myself, having a lifelong aversion to bright light which continues to this day) – so only a bright ray of sunlight with circulating dust motes was visible. I then toddled up to the door and leaned on it with all my weight to close it – and my thought was “Finally – I can be on my own!” I remember struggling to get to my feet and think I was wearing a nappy/plastic pants, as I can remember the feeling of them (puffy & padded around the rear).

The other early memory is weirdly existential – I was wearing a Babygro – an orange one with striped, orange-and-white inserts on the toes & the area around the rear which had poppers (press-studs) for easy nappy changing. I was walking/toddling along the landing in the direction of my parents’ room. It was dark outside so presumably night-time. I clearly remember looking at the stripy feet of the burnt-orange Babygro as I walked along and thinking to myself, “Who am I, and what am I doing here?” I can remember feeling a sense of “what’s the point of all this?” I can’t remember where I ended up but I recall that I was aware I should not be up & about, wandering around on my own at that time of day/night.

Other early memories are warmer, such as being taken to the local garage (filling station) in the car with my dad and wearing pyjamas with skateboarding cats on the front (Marks & Spencers of course)! And listening to Silver Lady by David Soul on the car radio in my dad’s metallic green Ford Cortina! (I asked my dad what the song was called & told him I liked it.) Many years later my brother had the song as the first dance at his wedding! And yes, I still like it.

 

[Iris]

A U.S. chap I used to talk to said that his earliest memory was of lying on some straw in the barn and some cows looking over the edges of the box at him.

 

[Salmonellus]

A U.S. chap I used to talk to said that his earliest memory was of lying on some straw in the barn and some cows looking over the edges of the box at him.

He was recalling a previous life as a calf?

 

[Iris]

No, as a baby who had been put down in the barn while his parents were working.