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The World's Dumbest Criminals

A bank employee printed himself a $65,000 certified check which he used to buy a new BMW. It apparently never occurred to him he'd left a complete paper (and CCTV trail) demonstrating his guilt. Now he's fired and busted.
Mass. bank worker accused of forging $65,000 check to buy new BMW

A bank employee in Boston’s Hyde Park neighborhood has been accused of forging a $65,000 at the bank to buy himself a brand new BMW ...

Damion Evans, 42, has been charged with embezzlement from a bank, forgery of a check and uttering a false check ...

While working at the Boston bank last June, authorities said Evans forged a $65,000 treasurer’s check to buy a new BMW.

On June 10, bank officers told police that Evans generated a $65,000 treasurer’s check for an unknown reason ... When confronted about the alleged generated check, Evans reportedly told bank officers he had drafted the check as a mistake and deleted the transaction. However, he was not able to produce the physical check.

Video from the time the check was reportedly generated showed Evans assisting no customers ...

On June 16, the alleged forged check was used to buy a blue BMW X6 at BMW of Norwood ...

Bank officials contacted police on July 5 to report the treasurer’s check transaction. The district attorney’s office said bank officials provided police with a copy of the check, signed by Evans.

Evans was fired from the bank the next day. ...
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FULL STORY: https://www.masslive.com/police-fir...ed-of-forging-65000-check-to-buy-new-bmw.html
 

Man shot and killed his friend when he accidentally opened fire with a submachine gun as they prepared to go on a 'ride-out' to attack rivals​


A man was shot dead when his friend accidentally opened fire with a submachine gun as they prepared to go on a 'ride-out' attack, a court has heard.

Mohamed Muhyidin, 28, was found in a ditch near Heathrow Airport with a single gunshot wound to the back on the morning of October 31 last year around an hour after he was allegedly killed by Chiragh Amir Chiragh, 39.

Prosecutors say they were about to embark on a 'ride-out' in a Toyota Prius to attack unknown targets when Chiragh shot his friend in the back with an Agram 2002 submachine gun fitted with a silencer.

The victim was sitting in the front passenger seat when the gunman got into the back of the car, shooting Muhyidin seconds later before getting out of the vehicle and firing the gun into the ground, Isleworth Crown Court heard.

Jurors were told Chiragh told police he had been asked to transport the gun, which went off when he put it on the back seat.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/ar...y-opened-fire-submachine-gun-court-hears.html

maximus otter
 
Another potential terrorist attack that went wrong?
Where do they get weapons like that over here? WTF.
 
maximus otter said:

Man shot and killed his friend when he accidentally opened fire with a submachine gun as they prepared to go on a 'ride-out' to attack rivals​


A man was shot dead when his friend accidentally opened fire with a submachine gun as they prepared to go on a 'ride-out' attack, a court has heard.

Mohamed Muhyidin, 28, was found in a ditch near Heathrow Airport with a single gunshot wound to the back on the morning of October 31 last year around an hour after he was allegedly killed by Chiragh Amir Chiragh, 39.

Prosecutors say they were about to embark on a 'ride-out' in a Toyota Prius to attack unknown targets when Chiragh shot his friend in the back with an Agram 2002 submachine gun fitted with a silencer.

The victim was sitting in the front passenger seat when the gunman got into the back of the car, shooting Muhyidin seconds later before getting out of the vehicle and firing the gun into the ground, Isleworth Crown Court heard.

Jurors were told Chiragh told police he had been asked to transport the gun, which went off when he put it on the back seat.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/ar...y-opened-fire-submachine-gun-court-hears.html

maximus otter
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Sounds familiar....
 
Absolutely no sympathy for any of them, the deceased would likely gone on to
kill someone else maybe an innocent party, the others dumped their so-called friend
in a ditch then did everything they could to evade the consequences, and even
tried to defraud the insurance over the car they burned.
:omr:
 
He fingered himself.

An armed gentleman in North Carolina failed his home invasion attempt, but kindly left a severed finger behind to help investigators track him down.

The 67-year-old gunman, Vernon Forest Wilson, tried to force himself into a man's house at 7am on Thursday as the resident was returning from his car. The burglar even fired his gun, grazing the resident in the chest. The resident fought back, however, managing, even after the gunshot, to slam the door in the burglar's face — as well as on his gloved hand.

In the end, the resident gained the "upper hand" when the burglar ran off without his glove, which still included part of a finger that had most likely been snipped by the door. This led police to Wilson, who was charged with first-degree burglary and "assault with a deadly weapon with intent to kill," according to Yahoo!.

https://boingboing.net/2022/10/11/m...nger-behind-leading-police-to-his-arrest.html
 
Lord Lucan said:
He'll be a hard one to track down!

Man with ‘BEAST’ tattooed across forehead wanted over outstanding warrant​

https://7news.com.au/news/nsw/man-w...ead-wanted-over-outstanding-warrant-c-8381147
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Update ... The man with the 'BEAST' tattoo has been located and arrested, after taunting the cops with an updated Facebook profile photo earlier this week. The Facebook bit qualifies him for ongoing coverage in this particular thread.
‘Beast’ tattooed wanted man caught by police

A wanted man who went viral because of his distinctive face tattoos has been arrested by police in NSW’s south west.

On September 28, Murray River Police issued an alert seeking assistance in locating Jaimes Sutton, who was wanted on two outstanding arrest warrants in relation to alleged traffic, property and domestic-related offences. ...

Mr Sutton seemingly taunted police by updating his Facebook profile picture earlier this week to a selfie where he had covered the lower half of his face.

One person commented: “Cops won’t even recognize ya now bra.” ...

But on Wednesday investigators attended a home on Gimlet Place, Leeton and Mr Sutton was arrested around 2.45pm.

He was taken to Leeton Police Station and charged with both outstanding warrants.

The Deniliquin man was refused bail to appear in Griffith Local Court on Thursday.
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SOURCE (With Photos): https://www.news.com.au/national/ns...e/news-story/0f9a9d17ddeb19b1fa265007e4322046
 
This Ohio man phoned to arrange a contract hit on his son. He mistakenly dialed a business number and left voicemail messages which were then referred to the police.
Cleveland father accidentally calls Westlake business attempting to hire someone to murder his son, police say

Westlake Police are investigating after they say a Cleveland father accidentally called a business to hire someone to murder his son.

Police say they received a call at 10:45 p.m. on October 13 from a business on Canterbury Road to report suspicious voicemails. An employee was alarmed because the messages indicated that a man wanted to put a $5,000 hit on another person ...

Police said that detectives discovered the man misdialed an individual's phone number and accidentally left the messages.

The 58-year-old man from Cleveland admitted to making the calls and was arrested, according to police, who say the man blamed poor judgment from a previous argument with his son, and alcohol, for making the calls.

He has been charged with felony complicity to commit murder. ...
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FULL STORY: https://www.news5cleveland.com/news...-to-hire-someone-to-murder-his-son-police-say
 
Dopey thief tries to raid a Post Office wearing a Sainsbury’s plastic bag as a mask

Jed James wore the bright orange carrier bag to raid a Post Office in Cowley, Oxfordshire, and has been jailed after telling the shop assistant he had a needle and a knife

Wearing the bag, he told her “Do you want me to show you - I’ve got a needle and a knife and you know what I’m going to do if you don’t give me cash and cigarettes.”

The woman behind the counter informed the Valium addict he was being ‘stupid’ and pointed out there were ‘cameras everywhere’.
Prosecutor Cathy Olliver told Oxford Crown Court on Monday: “He said ‘got cameras?’ and ran out of the Post Office without achieving his aim of [stealing] cash and cigarettes.”

Police spotted James at around 5pm – six hours after the bungled robbery bid.
An officer followed the would-be thief to a Co-operative where he caught him trying to pocket chicken breasts.

Gareth James, mitigating, said his client had effectively no memory of the events, but accepted it was him on the CCTV.
He described the crimes as an ‘uncharacteristic spree of offending while under the influence of drugs and alcohol, which he realises he cannot repeat and needs to address’
Judge Ian Pringle KC jailed James for two-and-a-half years.
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This criminal genius couldn't make either his spoken or written threats understood at two different locations. He'll now have more than 4 years in prison to contemplate his screw-up(s).
Bomb threat robber failed in Post Office raid after cashier couldn't read his demand note

A bungling bomb threat robber failed in a raid on a Post Office after the cashier couldn’t understand him or read his note demanding money. Martin Travers' elaborate scheme fell apart when the cashier couldn’t understand what he was saying and then couldn’t read his handwriting on a note passed over the counter. Birmingham Crown Court heard Travers had gone into a post office in central Birmingham at around 4pm on July 6 last year carrying a red shoe box, wearing a hoodie and sunglasses. He told the cashier to put money in the box but she did not understand what he was saying. ...

"He put a piece of paper on the counter, but she was unable to read the writing" ...

The defendant then said “You have 40 seconds, put the money in the box” ...

Travers then said the woman had 20 seconds before becoming frustrated, picked up the piece of paper and left.

The court heard the defendant then walked a short distance to a bookies in Broad Street where because of the mask he was wearing the cashier there had problems in making out what he was saying to her. ...

He put the demand note on the counter, but the wrong way up, so initially all the victim saw were some phone numbers. ...

She then refused to hand any cash over and Travers, who still had the shoe box, then told her there was something in the box "that could go off."

The cashier then made a 999 call and Travers managed to snatch £15 from the till before fleeing. ...

He was seen to throw the box in a bin and when it was later recovered it was found to contain items made to look like an improvised explosive device. ...

Travers, 32, of Markby Road, Hockley, who had previously admitted robbery and attempted robbery, was jailed for four years and 10 months on Thursday. ...
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FULL STORY: https://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/1687434/Robber-demand-note-fail-post-office-raid
 
This Pennsylvania thief was apparently attempting to steal wire from high on a power grid tower when he was shocked / burned by contact with the high voltage lines, fell off, and was left dangling injured and helpless until hunters heard his cries for help. HIs excuse was that he was deer spotting rather than wire stealing, but the cops aren't buying it ...
Man stealing wire from Slate Belt power tower severely shocked, found hanging by hunters, cops say

A man stealing stored wire high up on a power stanchion in Plainfield Township suffered a severe shock and burns when a live wire arced through him, throwing him from his perch about 50 feet up, police report.

The man had secured himself to the tower, so he dropped 20 or 30 feet, then swung and struck the structure before hanging in the air until his screams were heard by hunters, Slate Belt Regional police Chief Jonathon Hoadley told lehighvalleylive.com ... It’s not clear how long the man was up there before being found, Hoadley added. ...

Once a power company shut off electricity to the line ... township firefighters were able to bring the man down with their ladder truck ...

The man, who is in his 40s, was badly burned as the electricity surged through him, Hoadley said, expressing surprise the man survived.

“He’s going to have quite a battle” to recover ...

The man was talking on his way to the ambulance ... He claimed he was deer spotting, not stealing, the chief added.

The man was after wire that is stored on the tower in case work needs to be done on existing lines, Hoadley said. It was the second tower the man had hit, the chief added. The man had insulated tools with him and those were recovered by police, Hoadley said.

Criminal charges will be filed against the man ...
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SOURCE: https://www.lehighvalleylive.com/ne...hock-found-hanging-by-hunters-police-say.html
 
Two burglars, one getaway driver, one burglar is shot & flees, drops gun then the other burglar shot & killed by son with the dropped gun.

Burglar dressed as cop accidentally shoots accomplice after confusing him with officer

Two burglars were dressed in riot gear as Houston police officers were attempting to smash down a door in Katy, Texas, when the homeowner was trying to get to sleep during a terrifying break-in

Three residents, who have not been named, were in the house in Katy, which is 30 miles outside of Houston, when the two burglars dressed in riot gear attempted to raid the house.

The homeowner, along with their two adult sons, were trying to get to sleep when they heard a large banging noise outside the front door.

As the burglars smashed their way into the home, the suspects for "unknown reasons began shooting immediately" as one suspect reportedly shot his accomplice "inadvertently".

But as the two adult sons went to confront the burglars, a gun was pointed and shot in their direction, which could have been when one of the burglars was shot, according to Sheriff Ed Gonzalez.

The burglar, who was wounded by the bullet, immediately dropped his weapon and tried to run from the home, police said.

He then ran to a dark getaway car which was waiting outside by a third suspect and drove away from the scene.

One of the sons picked up the gun and shot dead the other suspected burglar.

Authorities revealed that police were searching for the two suspects, the driver, and the wounded individual who fled the scene.
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Wow, the writing is especially bad in that piece. Even for the Mirror. I especially like the barely literate sub header that suggests that the house occupants were trying to get to sleep while being terrifyingly broken into.
hunck said:
Two burglars were dressed in riot gear as Houston police officers were attempting to smash down a door in Katy, Texas, when the homeowner was trying to get to sleep during a terrifying break-in
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Min Bannister said:
Wow, the writing is especially bad in that piece. Even for the Mirror. I especially like the barely literate sub header that suggests that the house occupants were trying to get to sleep while being terrifyingly broken into.
Click to expand...
Yeah it’s none too clever. Took me a couple of reads to work out what happened..
 
Unplugging the interior security camera inside the house you're robbing would seem to be a wise precaution ...
... unless (like this burglar in New Jersey) you don't unplug it until you return to the house a second time and stare directly into the camera before unplugging it.
Police: Suspect sought for breaking into Cape May home twice, unplugging security cam

A burglary suspect was caught on security camera just moments before he allegedly unplugged the device.

Police say the man used several tools to break into the rear door of a home on Sunset Boulevard in Cape May last week. ...
|
Hours later he came back to the same house, and entered using a key police say he found earlier that day. ...

Police say the suspect then walked up to a security camera in the home's family room, and unplugged it.

Photos posted by Cape May Police appear to show the suspect sneaking around the home, and staring straight into the camera. ...
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SOURCE: https://www.fox29.com/news/police-s...o-cape-may-home-twice-unplugging-security-cam
 
Man hires Uber cab to rob bank

And afterwards is driven back to his flat. The driver waits for him & is apparently unaware of the robbery. Robber gets quickly nabbed when police find the car on cctv & trace the hirer. He’s found with the money & covered in red dye from the wallet given to him by the bank.

Mr Barron said the suspect had the same clothes on as the robbery which were covered in red dye.

He was asked by cops if he had been shot due to the "red stuff" which was all over his body.

Southfield Police Chief Elvin Barren said: "This is a very unusual way to commit an armed robbery in our city."
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In Southfield, Michigan.

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Man robs bank with a demand note written on the back of his own birth certificate

In Springfield Missouri. He’s now facing a maximum jail sentence of 20 years. All for $754.
Michael Conley Loyd, who admitted to the robbery on the day, was tracked down thanks to his ankle tag which he was wearing for a previous offence he had committed.

He stole $754 (£640) after giving one of the employees a note written on the back of his birth certificate saying: “Give Your Money Now. Don’t Say Anything. I Have A Partner Outside.”

The bank worker handed over the money to him, as she feared for her safety, and Loyd quickly escaped in a black pickup truck that he stole from his roommate.

According to authorities, the boyfriend of the roommate quickly informed police of the bank robbery and they were able to find him at the Lazy Acres Mobile Home Park where he lived.
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A Pennsylvania teenaged boy felt the need to dispose of a teen girl's body. He posted on Instagram - confessing to killing the girl, showing the body, and asking for help in disposing of her corpse.
16-year-old confesses over Instagram to fatal shooting, Pennsylvania police say

A Pennsylvania teen has been charged with murder after he allegedly confessed over Instagram to fatally shooting another child, according to police.

The Bensalem Police Department received a 911 call Friday afternoon about a possible homicide, with the caller detailing an Instagram video chat she received from a friend ...

In the chat, the teen stated that he "had just killed someone" before flipping the camera around and showing the legs and feet of someone covered in blood, police said. He then asked for assistance with disposing the body ...

The caller told police that the teen who sent the message lived at the Top of the Ridge trailer park in Bensalem ... When officers arrived, the teen ran out of the back of a trailer, and he was later arrested about a mile away on Newport Mews Drive and Groton Drive ...

Officers who entered the trailer observed a girl on the floor of the bathroom dead from an apparent gunshot wound, according to authorities. There were also "substantial steps" taken to clean up the crime scene, investigators said.

The victim's identity and age have not been released, other than that she is a juvenile.

The suspect, 16-year-old Joshua Cooper, is being charged as an adult for criminal homicide, possessing instruments of crime and tampering with or fabricating physical evidence, police said. ...
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FULL STORY (With Photo): https://www.yahoo.com/gma/16-old-confesses-over-instagram-171200289.html

ALTERNATIVE SOURCE: https://abcnews.go.com/US/16-year-c...hooting-pennsylvania-police/story?id=94039631
 

Drug traffickers caught by police after sending photo of dog showing phone number on collar​


A drug trafficker who sent photos of his pet dog to accomplices didn’t realise they would be one of the clues that would lead police to his door.

Danny Brown, 52, sent photos of Bob the dog to co-conspirator Stefan Baldauf, 62, as they worked on a plot to send 448 kilos of the drug MDMA worth £45m to Australia.

National Crime Agency investigators zoomed in on the photo, sent over encrypted communications platform EncroChat, to reveal Brown’s partner’s phone number on Bob’s tag.

Brown and Baldauf also sent accidental selfies over the platform – Brown managed to capture his reflection in a photo of a television while Baldauf was visible in a picture of a brass door sign.

https://www.policingnews.co.uk/2022...-photo-of-dog-showing-phone-number-on-collar/

maximus otter
 
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