The World's Dumbest Criminals

ramonmercado said:
If they were well wrapped and oiled they might be of use.
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I read an account of the Rhodesian Bush War, in which Rhodesian troops discovered an AK-47 buried in an anthill. The woodwork had been completely eaten away by the termites, and the rifle was rusty AF.

A trooper shook some of the obvious dirt out of the action, cocked the rifle and was immediately able to fire off the full mag on Auto.

l recall my own force recovering a sawn-off Ithaca 37 pump-action shotgun hidden in a ditch, wrapped in a fertiliser sack, the woodwork taped up to thwart fingerprint examination. lt was still entirely functional, and would have remained so for decades with minimal preventive maintenance.

maximus otter
 
escargot said:
I'm glad to say I know nothing of such matters. :)

Apart from what I've seen in action fillums, where the hero can drag a gun from a swamp (having first punched aside two or more alligators) and it will work perfectly right away. :bthumbup:
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I watch a You Tube channel called Forgotten Weapons, the creator has a deep interest in firearm history, especially the proto-type and exotic. Sometimes, he runs tests on guns after really abusing them.
One such is the Laugo "Alien" pistol. The mechanism is quite innovative and Ian (the creator) actually bought one then ... tested it. Plugging the muzzle, he dropped it in water, left it in mud made with fine sand etc. then, removing the muzzle block, fired off a full magazine without issue. He points out that the military puts proposed arms through such tests.
I'd imagine the time it's left in such hostile conditions plays an important part though.
 
'Mythbusters' over the years, covered many, many weapons from all through history, how they worked, what their effects were, oddities, and the results of use and mis-use.
 

Leeds suspected car thieves arrested after police follow snowy footprints​

    • Published
      6 hours ago

The two alleged car thieves were arrested after officer followed their footprints in the snow in Leeds
Two alleged car thieves were arrested in Leeds after officers followed their footsteps in the snow from the abandoned vehicle to their homes.
In a social media post, West Yorkshire Police's Dogs unit said the pair should be given the "dumbest criminal award".
The tweet added that despite the snowy weather on Thursday not deterring them, "cold must have numbed their brains".
One comment said the two "should have run backwards so the footsteps went the other way".
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https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-engla...fSeBn-eJzMDC4dDUCPQDyq0EfnXIl_WdQeou_z1YmEn4A
 

You Should Probably Charge Your EV Before Using It As a Robbery Getaway Car​


“I’m guilty of complaining about EV charging infrastructure, but I’ve never been in a situation where charging times or lack of access ruined my day. That’s the exact opposite of the experience two thieves recently had in Georgia, as their stop to charge their Tesla Model X was their undoing.

A little planning ahead might have saved the two suspects, who stole some gaming systems and other gear from a Sam’s Club. Police images also show several electronic toothbrushes, some guns, and several bags packed with marijuana. They stopped to charge less than ten miles away from the store, giving police enough time to track them down using descriptions of the vehicle from the scene.”

https://www.thetruthaboutcars.com/c...re-using-it-as-a-robbery-getaway-car-44499781

maximus otter
 
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Stupid uber alles.

Seabrook, New Hampshire police arrested Meghan Leavitt, 38, for calling in fake threats to a Walmart in the area.

She started with a bomb threat and followed up with another call about an active shooter in the store. How'd police identify her as the suspect? Leavitt was apparently using her speakerphone to make the calls while riding in an Uber on the way to the Walmart, and the driver alerted the cops. Why would she do such a thing? From WMUR9:

Officers say she was coming to the complex because her boyfriend was about to be arrested at the Dick's Sporting Goods across from the Walmart for shop lifting. He was hiding in a changing room talking to her before she made the calls.
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https://boingboing.net/2023/03/20/w...to-prevent-boyfriends-shoplifting-arrest.html
 
Swifty said:
Bear spray wielding robbers attack Canadian cannabis store and are thwarted by bong wielding employee ..

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Here's a bong which could have gotten the owner shot.

Australian police have charged a man who was seen allegedly carrying what seemed to be an AK-47 assault rifle – but which turned out to have a rather different purpose.

Officers rushed into action after a flurry of emergency calls from north-west Sydney on Wednesday evening. A helicopter joined the search before CCTV led police to a parked car. A "gun" was recovered, but police soon realised it was in fact a bong - a device used to smoke marijuana.

A 50-year-old man was later arrested in connection with the incident, police said.

"A search of [a] vehicle by police allegedly located an imitation AK-47 assault rifle. With the assistance of Polair [helicopter], officers found a man in nearby grassland," a New South Wales Police statement said.

The man was later charged with possession of an unauthorised firearm and intimidation. He has been remanded in custody and his case will be heard in April.

Police will allege in court that the seized item was a bong, a water-filled filtration device used to smoke marijuana and other herbal substances, local media reported.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-australia-65120330
 
Mugger yelled out his real name to witness as he robbed man at knifepoint

Kyle Wood asked 'do you know who I am?' before shouting out his own name as he robbed a victim at knifepoint in a terrifying incident in Long Eaton, Derbyshire

Wood, who wasn't helped by the fact he had a distinctive teardrop tattoo on his face, robbed both men separately as they got off buses in the town shortly after midnight on August 30 last year.

When a Samaritan tried to intervene during the second robbery, Woods shouted back asking, "don't get involved, do you know who I am? I'm Kyle Wood, keep the f*** out.”

Matthew Smith, for Wood, said his client, who has 19 convictions for 60 offences, had written letters of apology to both victims and carried out the offences during "a self-destruct moment".

Cocky Woods told Derby Crown court, "I don't care I'm a big bad wolf", before refusing to stick around on the video link from prison to find out his fate.
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He was jailed for 3 years 8 months. His accomplice Ami Turner was handed a 19-month jail sentence, suspended for two years, with 25 rehabilitation sessions and a 12-month mental health treatment programme.
 
Man bragged about stealing money from drug cartels. Now he's missing.

https://www.yahoo.com/news/texas-man-bragged-stealing-money-190240138.html

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A March 24 video recording captured a man with a bloodied face in the passenger seat of a blue Dodge Ram with several other men at 1:09 a.m. He opens the door and tries to jump out, but the men grab him and pull him back inside, officials said in the complaint.

The truck blows past the bridge attendant and heads into Mexico, leaving a blood-stained shirt and pair of pants along the road, according to the complaint.

Hours earlier, Ramirez was boastful, witnesses told investigators. They overheard him talking on the phone at 11 p.m. during a party at a home in Laredo, telling an unknown woman he’d stolen $50,000 from Cartel Del Noreste, according to documents.

He told the woman he wasn’t scared of her, that he didn’t fear retribution because he was in the United States, witnesses said.

But about two hours later, at 12:45 a.m., the blue truck arrived at the address. Masked men with guns got out, attacked Ramirez, dragged him into the cab and drove off, officials said in the documents.
 
Air National Guardsmen seem to be seriously lacking in street smarts.

Josiah Ernesto Garcia, 21, an Air National Guardsman from Tennessee, chanced across rentahitman.com and tried to sign up despite it glowing like the sun.

He submitted his ID, his resume, and a cover letter identifying him as an expert marksman. At some point the site's operators realized he wasn't messing around and called in the FBI, which he soon agreed to kill someone for, earning himself federal charges instead of the anticipated $5,000.

The Department of Justice press release follows.

NASHVILLE – A Hermitage, Tennessee, man is facing federal charges after meeting with an undercover FBI agent to culminate a deal to murder an individual for payment, announced U.S. Attorney Henry C. Leventis.
Josiah Ernesto Garcia, 21, was charged yesterday in a criminal complaint with the use of interstate facilities in the commission of murder-for-hire.
According to the complaint, Garcia needed money to support his family and in mid-February began searching online for contract mercenary jobs and came across the website www.rentahitman.com
Originally created in 2005 to advertise a cyber security startup company, the company failed and over the next decade it received many inquiries about murder-for-hire services. The website's administrator then converted the website to a parody site that contains false testimonials from those who have purported to use hit man services, and an intake form where people can request services. The website also has an option for someone to apply to work as a hired killer. ...
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https://boingboing.net/2023/04/17/a...-work-turns-out-he-was-messaging-the-fbi.html
 
ramonmercado said:
Air National Guardsmen seem to be seriously lacking in street smarts.

Josiah Ernesto Garcia, 21, an Air National Guardsman from Tennessee, chanced across rentahitman.com and tried to sign up despite it glowing like the sun.

He submitted his ID, his resume, and a cover letter identifying him as an expert marksman. At some point the site's operators realized he wasn't messing around and called in the FBI, which he soon agreed to kill someone for, earning himself federal charges instead of the anticipated $5,000.

The Department of Justice press release follows.



https://boingboing.net/2023/04/17/a...-work-turns-out-he-was-messaging-the-fbi.html
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l’m amused to see that the site has been updated to offer 10% discount to Air National Guardsmen!

maximus otter
 
I bet they're hopping mad.

Criminals in Peru appear to have wrong-footed themselves during a robbery at a shoe store.

Three people broke into the shop in the central city of Huancayo and made off with more than 200 trainers - but they were all for the right foot. The shop owner estimates that they have a value of more $13,000 (£10,000) - although the thieves may struggle to sell them on.

The lame attempt at a lucrative robbery was captured by security cameras. The footage shows the criminals breaking the padlock on the shop's shutter in the middle of the night and using a tricycle to take boxes of trainers from different brands.

Local police chief Eduan Díaz told Peruvian media: "We have gathered evidence at the scene. The unusual thing about this robbery is that shoes from only the right foot have been stolen. With the footage and the fingerprints, we will be able to locate those individuals".

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-latin-america-65483468
 
The dumbest part of the whole thing is the daft little twonk has got himself a ban 'from all retail establishments' including even entering the whole of an entire shopping centre.
What an arse.
 

Chelsea Flower Show: Just Stop Oil protesters arrested​





The three protesters at the Chelsea Flower Show



Three Just Stop Oil activists have been arrested on suspicion of causing criminal damage at the RHS Chelsea Flower Show.
Protesters released orange powder paint in the show gardens at the Royal Hospital Chelsea at about 09:00 BST.
Cdr Karen Findlay of the Met Police's major operations team said the gardens had been "criminally damaged".
A spokesperson for the Royal Horticultural Society said: "The three protesters are all off site now."
The orange substance in one of the show gardens

Protesters released an orange powder paint in the show gardens
They added there had been no disruption to visitors and the show remained open to ticketed guests.
"The RHS' primary concern is for the safety of its visitors, exhibitors and everyone at the show," the spokesperson said.
The three women targeted a garden, designed by Paul Hervey-Brookes, for wealth manager RBC Brewin Dolphin.
A Just Stop Oil spokesperson said the protest was part of their fifth week of action in London.
The environmental protest group is calling for the government to halt all new oil, gas and coal projects.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-65707564
 
Floyd1 said:

Chelsea Flower Show: Just Stop Oil protesters arrested​





The three protesters at the Chelsea Flower Show



Three Just Stop Oil activists have been arrested on suspicion of causing criminal damage at the RHS Chelsea Flower Show.
Protesters released orange powder paint in the show gardens at the Royal Hospital Chelsea at about 09:00 BST.
Cdr Karen Findlay of the Met Police's major operations team said the gardens had been "criminally damaged".
A spokesperson for the Royal Horticultural Society said: "The three protesters are all off site now."
The orange substance in one of the show gardens

Protesters released an orange powder paint in the show gardens
They added there had been no disruption to visitors and the show remained open to ticketed guests.
"The RHS' primary concern is for the safety of its visitors, exhibitors and everyone at the show," the spokesperson said.
The three women targeted a garden, designed by Paul Hervey-Brookes, for wealth manager RBC Brewin Dolphin.
A Just Stop Oil spokesperson said the protest was part of their fifth week of action in London.
The environmental protest group is calling for the government to halt all new oil, gas and coal projects.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-65707564
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I hope they're eaten by Triffids.
 
I like the report in the Daily Mail for it's even handed treatment of the story.
(includes film of the protest)
Flower power! Have-a-go-heroine hoses down Just Stop Oil zealots who 'permanently damaged' sustainable garden at Chelsea Flower Show with orange paint in eco-mob's latest infuriating stunt.
An angry onlooker shouted 'you morons' (at them ...) minutes before they were sprayed with a hose by a have-a-go heroine in the group's latest stunt.
(...) The incident, caught on camera, prompted witnesses to shout abuse at the protesters, with one man heard saying: 'Oh no, oh for god's, you morons - all you're doing is ruining them, you prats.'
(...) others could be heard shouting for security before a woman grabbed a hose and doused the protesters with water.
(...) officers arrested the women, named as Stephanie Golder, 35, Naomi Goddard, 58 and Rosa Hicks, 28, for criminal damage.
(...) Ms Goddard, from Hebden Bridge, West Yorkshire, could be heard in the video saying: 'What is the point in a garden if you can't eat? What is the point in tradition if society is collapsing around you?' One man interrupted the speech, shouting: 'Rubbish.'
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12123321/Now-Just-Stop-Oil-disrupt-Chelsea-Flower-Show.html
 
So, you're a member of a jury.

You're warned explicitly of your duties and responsibilities. And potential penalties...

Do you a) adhere to these rules or b) look up the accused on Google during the trial and then talk to your fellow jurors about what you discovered, thus causing a mistrial?

If you answered b, then you can go to jail, directly to jail without passing go. That is, if you're a complete flippin' f***wit!

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news...l-to-collapse-by-researching-defendant-online

I was on jury duty a few years ago and posted about it here, but before I posted I checked what I was able to write about - which in the UK is very, very little...
 
cycleboy2 said:
So, you're a member of a jury.

You're warned explicitly of your duties and responsibilities. And potential penalties...

Do you a) adhere to these rules or b) look up the accused on Google during the trial and then talk to your fellow jurors about what you discovered, thus causing a mistrial?

If you answered b, then you can go to jail, directly to jail without passing go. That is, if you're a complete flippin' f***wit!

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news...l-to-collapse-by-researching-defendant-online

I was on jury duty a few years ago and posted about it here, but before I posted I checked what I was able to write about - which in the UK is very, very little...
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The man knew the rules, too. My sympathy is at 0 right now.
 
cycleboy2 said:
So, you're a member of a jury.

You're warned explicitly of your duties and responsibilities. And potential penalties...

Do you a) adhere to these rules or b) look up the accused on Google during the trial and then talk to your fellow jurors about what you discovered, thus causing a mistrial?

If you answered b, then you can go to jail, directly to jail without passing go. That is, if you're a complete flippin' f***wit!

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news...l-to-collapse-by-researching-defendant-online

I was on jury duty a few years ago and posted about it here, but before I posted I checked what I was able to write about - which in the UK is very, very little...
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At least he didn't try to contact a murder victim with a ouija board. :chuckle:
 
I'm not sure whether this counts as a dumb criminal but a long time ago I was on a jury.

We'd been hearing the evidence and were sent out while some legal discussions were taking place. We talked about the case while we were waiting in the jury room and most of us felt that the accused was probably innocent.

When we trooped back into the courtroom we were told that the defendant had changed his plea to guilty!

It says something for the reliability of juries at the very least.
 
Erinaceus said:
I'm not sure whether this counts as a dumb criminal but a long time ago I was on a jury.

We'd been hearing the evidence and were sent out while some legal discussions were taking place. We talked about the case while we were waiting in the jury room and most of us felt that the accused was probably innocent.

When we trooped back into the courtroom we were told that the defendant had changed his plea to guilty!

It says something for the reliability of juries at the very least.
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You hadn't heard everything and might have changed your minds later. The dangers of making a quick decision!

Juries tend to give certain type of defendants the benefit of the doubt. Without the full picture, and if the defendant were presenting well, your jury may have done the same. Human nature.

Finally; it's morally better to find someone not guilty, at least of a relatively minor crime, than to lock up an innocent person.
 
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