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The Nicola Bulley Disappearance (St Michael's On Wyre, Lancashire)

Min Bannister said:
The ones who had vaguely tolerable symptoms would have. The rest would have drank or killed themselves. Just because it wasn't spoken of, doesn't mean it didn't happen.
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I've spent a long time researching asylum case notes from 18th and 19th centuries and it's shocking how many of those drs' notes are basically describing a woman with postnatal depression, or the menopause, or probably something like a temporary post partum psychosis. The worst i found was a young woman who was left to deal with a psychotic mother, on her own, in a remote cottage in the Yorkshire Dales, who started showing (mild) signs of a perfectly understandable depression - she was only 15 when admitted to the asylum and she died there, in her 80s... Basically, a teen carer left alone with a really unstable person, with no support, miles from home in a remote place. Paid a very heavy price. (The mother was never even admitted).
 
Yithian said:
View attachment 63474

The Nicola Bulley Disappearance, please.​

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To be fair, menopausal symptoms, severity thereof and insufficient understanding about, are pertinent to this case. Too many people (usually men) think it's just a case of feeling a bit warm (usually in a comedic way), and I can see those reading about the case wondering how the hell 'difficulties with the menopause' could possibly be relevent to a woman's disappearance.

Hearing that it can, and often is, a miserable, life changing experience, may make them reassess what poor Nicola may have been going through.
 
catseye said:
I should say that menopause for me has been pretty smooth sailing, but I suspect this is purely because I am single and can be as crabbit and moody as I like at home without affecting anyone.
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What about your poor doggie?
 
catseye said:
I can see those reading about the case wondering how the hell 'difficulties with the menopause' could possibly be relevent to a woman's disappearance.
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And indeed it seems like the wider internet has got even nastier after that disclosure. :(
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-64665835

In a new statement, they said: "As a family, we were aware beforehand that Lancashire Police, last night, released a statement with some personal details about our Nikki.
"Although we know that Nikki would not have wanted this, there are people out there speculating and threatening to sell stories about her. This is appalling and needs to stop
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Yithian said:
Bastards.

Speculating is one thing--however distasteful--but selling stories about her is about as low as it gets.

I hope this amounts to a very small number of people.
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Good points, but we need to remember who might be buying the stories. If certain tabloids didn't show an interest there wouldn't be a market.
 
escargot said:
Good points, but we need to remember who might be buying the stories. If certain tabloids didn't show an interest there wouldn't be a market.
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This I should have said myself. You're 100% correct.

And then, to complete the nasty little circle, we come back around to who is buying those tabloids.

It's not so much asking which is more to blame, but seeing that each reinforces the other.
 
Yithian said:
This I should have said myself. You're 100% correct.

And then, to complete the nasty little circle, we come back around to who is buying those tabloids.

It's not so much asking which is more to blame, but seeing that each reinforces the other.
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Someone who sees nothing wrong with selling gossip to a tabloid will enjoy reading similar stories, and vice versa.

Same applies to glossy magazines, of course.
 
escargot said:
The menopause and its implications for women and their families are relevant here.
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I know it's being regarded in some places as a breach of privacy for the police to raise and people to discuss Ms Bulley's struggles with the menopause and related problems with alcohol. if it wises up more men to the potential problems seems to me a good thing.

My missus was 50 when she died and i realise looking back she never mentioned the menopause or any issues it may have caused her. And compared to my limited previous experience with women she was unusually open about 'women's problems'.

I don't even know if she'd started it. I'm ashamed of my ignorance regarding the person who mattered the most to me in the entire world.
 
For a long time now, the media has minimised the actual 'reporting of news' and increased baiting and salacious hints.
Reporting facts is boring while drama and mystery makes money.
The suggestion, though, that people are trying to make money from 'selling' stories means even the tabloids will be cautious; they'll pay for the right story - and one that they can either confirm or disavow them actually believing it. The Sonia Sutcliffe farrago has made them a bit leery.
 
Also, even the tabloids have standards.
Well, they might try not to look complete twonks. Again.
It's not about doing the right thing, it's more trying not to actually look like the bullies they are.

Can remember reading that Jeremy Bamber tried to sell 'glamorous' (soft porn) snaps of his sister to a tabloid after her death. This was too ghoulish even for them.
 
Mikefule said:
Sorry, that statement needs challenging. Social media gets disproportionate coverage in the mainstream media, but it only really dominates the lives of a small part of the population. Most people seldom or never use it.
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In my circles, I hardly know of anyone who does not use it.

TikTok is omnipotent for the under 20s.

Most small business have one or more of a Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tik Tok, Linked In account.

Then there are Snapchat and Only Fans too.

So much of mainstream media news is gleaned from social media, and regurgitated.

Just from a quick Google search here is a stat.

https://blog.digimind.com/en/agenci...the most used,66% of the country's population.

"In the UK, about 44.84 million of the estimated 67.9 million individuals who call the UK home use Facebook regularly, or about 66% of the country's population."

I mentioned social media because of the photos of Nichola Bulley I have seen in the press.
Selfies, or couple selfies, of walking the dog by the river etc.
To me a routine activity in no need of broadcast, yet it was captured by cameraphone.

Suggest to me that Facebook and Instagram played a notable part in this couple's lives.
 
I think social media plays a part in a different way. The rise of the true crime podcast etc. Has left a load of people with a burgeoning interest in (and appetite for) true crime and who have listened to all the podcasts etc and now want to try a bit of sleuthing themselves. It's been a massive thing, in the past couple of years.

And then recently, the "true crime community" if you can call it that, has had these huge, currently ongoing cases like the Idaho student murders and the Delphi murders (also called 'the Snapchat murders' as victims possibly lured to the place by a social media catfish). And then, boom, along comes a homegrown, UK, case that's equally intriguing and compelling. It's almost a perfect storm.

Tabloids look to be in their death throes, I don't even get how they have the money any more to spend a lot, buying stories?
 
Yithian said:
In the general sense, as catseye explained above, yes.
The specifics of the menstruation of individual posters here: I think no.
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I believe, but have no real reason to believe one way or the other, that @Kondoru was being slightly sarcastic. I think it's her sense of humour and she was offhandedly commenting on the information given about Nicola Bulley.
 
Im always slightly sarcastic. Thank you.

I never have had much trouble with Woman's stuff, I am naturally very beautiful and only occasionally go berserk when confronted with a small child.

Also I am allergic to dresses and never, ever listen to what other women say.

I am sure they find me equally suspicious/incomprehensible....
 
escargot said:
Also, even the tabloids have standards.
Well, they might try not to look complete twonks. Again.
It's not about doing the right thing, it's more trying not to actually look like the bullies they are.

Can remember reading that Jeremy Bamber tried to sell 'glamorous' (soft porn) snaps of his sister to a tabloid after her death. This was too ghoulish even for them.
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As far as I'm aware, the tabloids choose which missing persons stories to follow via their physical attributes. So a female blonde toddler is tops, a blonde, pretty female teen comes second, a blonde, pretty woman comes third, then attractive kids/women, then a young boy. After that you have moderately attractive kids, personable adults, and very rarely - a missing man, 'unattractive' members of the public, and finally, 'foreigners' (unless there's a profitable reason for mentioning them).
 
Victory said:
In my circles, I hardly know of anyone who does not use it.

TikTok is omnipotent for the under 20s.

Most small business have one or more of a Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tik Tok, Linked In account.

Then there are Snapchat and Only Fans too.

So much of mainstream media news is gleaned from social media, and regurgitated.

Just from a quick Google search here is a stat.

https://blog.digimind.com/en/agencies/facebook-uk-essential-figures#:~:text=Facebook is the most used,66% of the country's population.

"In the UK, about 44.84 million of the estimated 67.9 million individuals who call the UK home use Facebook regularly, or about 66% of the country's population."

I mentioned social media because of the photos of Nichola Bulley I have seen in the press.
Selfies, or couple selfies, of walking the dog by the river etc.
To me a routine activity in no need of broadcast, yet it was captured by cameraphone.

Suggest to me that Facebook and Instagram played a notable part in this couple's lives.
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I do not disagree with anything in this particular post (except I hope you meant omnipresent rather than omnipotent. I was challenging your statement that (quote) "social media dominates most people's lives." That's a very different statement from this more considered post. It is the difference between, "Most people are alcoholic" (not true) and "Most people I know like to have a drink."

I use Facebook more or less daily but almost exclusively for hobby pages (sailing, Morris dancing, music) where I can exchange information, opinions and banter with people with a shared interest. I seldom post about life events, never post pouting selfies, and do not become involved in gossip or bickering. I use Twitter sparingly, and almost exclusively as a publicity channel for my Morris dance side. Ditto with Instagram, although I use that more often than Twitter.

Most of the people I know use FB or other social media from time to time, and I do not have any relative, or anyone I would consider a friend, whose life is in any sense "dominated" by social media.

As for Nicola Bulley, I have found it disturbing from the start of the reporting of her disappearance that the "best" image they have of her is a vacuous selfie.
 
Mikefule said:
As for Nicola Bulley, I have found it disturbing from the start of the reporting of her disappearance that the "best" image they have of her is a vacuous selfie.
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Perhaps for same reason that some people's obits have pics that are 30 years or older - because that is the one that could be found at the time? Or it is the better one for people to identify her if they see her.
 
Mikefule said:
I do not disagree with anything in this particular post (except I hope you meant omnipresent rather than omnipotent. I was challenging your statement that (quote) "social media dominates most people's lives." That's a very different statement from this more considered post. It is the difference between, "Most people are alcoholic" (not true) and "Most people I know like to have a drink."

I use Facebook more or less daily but almost exclusively for hobby pages (sailing, Morris dancing, music) where I can exchange information, opinions and banter with people with a shared interest. I seldom post about life events, never post pouting selfies, and do not become involved in gossip or bickering. I use Twitter sparingly, and almost exclusively as a publicity channel for my Morris dance side. Ditto with Instagram, although I use that more often than Twitter.

Most of the people I know use FB or other social media from time to time, and I do not have any relative, or anyone I would consider a friend, whose life is in any sense "dominated" by social media.

As for Nicola Bulley, I have found it disturbing from the start of the reporting of her disappearance that the "best" image they have of her is a vacuous selfie.
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I actually meant Omnipotent!
The way that Tik Tok has infiltrated the teenagers...it really is as if they live through it.
Not all of them of course, but it has spread like a virus.

I use social media like you.
For reading news about particular interests.
In my case it will mainly be football, or a few bands that I like.
They will announce new releases online.

I do not have Facebook/Linked In.
The very idea makes me uneasy, of other people seeing my social network.

I lack the time to follow other peoples' online lives.
If something is important, I would hope they'd phone.

I do not have Tik Tok, a data mining app.

But I know people whose subject of conversation is what other people post on Facebook.
Or who really do seek esteem from people liking their tweets or photos.


Back to the Nicola Bulley case, it is possible that she had a stalker.
Perhaps a jealous mum of a child at her childrens' school?
Or an ex-boyfriend?

Who would have made a very close note of Nicola's routine from Facebook.
 
No one has mentioned a dog barking so if she was taken it was likely someone the dog knew there must be other unofficial ways out of the field
as well, not that I think that’s what happened,
 
RaM said:
No one has mentioned a dog barking so if she was taken it was likely someone the dog knew there must be other unofficial ways out of the field
as well, not that I think that’s what happened,
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My dog barks at everyone. Even people she's known since a puppy. A person approaching us is to be barked at.

I'd guess spaniels are a bit nicer though, but unlikely to be totally silent in the event of 'their person' walking away and leaving them.
 
RaM said:
No one has mentioned a dog barking so if she was taken it was likely someone the dog knew there must be other unofficial ways out of the field
as well, not that I think that’s what happened,
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This is a good point. Dogwalkers notice the sound of barking when they can't see the animal yet because it might mean issues for their own dog.

They might think, Do I know that dog? Is it barking in play or aggression? Should I get my dog under control or let it run ahead? Are we safe? and so on.
 
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